The Anatomy of Shoulder Surgery

So, I'm alive. Only just barely. I wasn't even sure about that until earlier this evening. The last 4 days went something like this:

I had to be at American Fork Hospital at 10:00 a.m. on Thursday. I was extremely hungry but I hardly noticed because I had to go potty so badly. Life was much happier after that sterile plastic cup and I had some time together in the bathroom. After a potty break I got to get all dolled up in some fancy thigh highs:
Then they asked me to give them permission to knock me out, cut me up, and leave me much worse off than I was when I arrived. I happily agreed:

This is one of my anesthesiologists...I believe he is in the witness protection program.

Of course, they have to poke you:

This is my very own Dr. Wells. He's a nice guy. Plus, that nurse in the background was really happy. I'm glad someone so jovial was in my operating room perking that place up a bit.

They also gave me a nerve block in my neck to make my shoulder and arm feel dead for several hours. It's pretty much an epidural for my arm. I don't have any photos because it weirded Aunt Kaye out too much and I don't believe she had the presence of mind to take photos of it. Apparently, one wrong move and they puncture your lung or do some permanent damage because of all the nerves that go straight to your head. The nerve block procedure was my first tip off that this was not going to be a pleasure to recover from. My Amy friend's mom had a shoulder scope one week earlier and did wonderfully. I decided that I would have that same experience. Only too bad for me...

My second tip off that this was not going to be my favorite was when I woke up and threw up for a few hours. I never felt so sick. When I stopped with the throwing up and came to my senses, a nice nurse man named Larry came and told me all about my pain pump. (This was the third tip off, 'cause I've never even heard of a pain pump you take home until that minute.)It lived in my sling and hooked up directly into my wound. It gave me a constant drip of pain numbing goodness, and I could also push a button and get an extra shot of it every half hour. FYI, if you ever go to the doctor and he wants to give you a nerve block and a pain pump, you should probably leave speedy quick because he is up to no good, I tell you.

I also had a Polar Care thingy. That is the blue thing with the number 1 on it in this photo:
It is my favorite parting gift they gave me when I left. It wraps around your afflicted body part and is connected to a cooler with an electric pump. It constantly pumps ice water over your owie.

Hank is not pleased with this whole situation because his perch of preference is on my chest. He's liked to sleep there since he was a kitten, only now he feels terribly displaced:

He wouldn't even sleep on the rug to make me feel a little less sad about his life. He went straight to the cement. Kids innately know what to do to make you feel the most guilty.

On Sunday a nurse came to my home and removed my pain pump. I did not know how in love I was with that pump until about 3 a.m. this morning. I'm glad that the Hallmark channel plays Golden Girls most of the night because I was too owie to do any actual sleeping. The good news about the pain pump removal was that the bandages came off and I could shower. Here's a peek of under the bandages:
Apparently, my doctor believes he is also an artist. Or at least a topographer because that looks suspiciously like a map on my shoulder. I know for sure he believes he is a photographer because he took lots of photos of what the inside of my shoulder looked like.

This is what happy healthy cartilage looks like. Nice and smooth and white. I'm not sure where this is located in my shoulder, but I think it's pretty. Then there's this:

That is a big old hunk of cartilage hanging down amongst some more really jacked up cartilage. I honestly don't know how I did that to myself, but I'd hate to think what I could do if I was trying.

That's the long and short of it. What I would like to mention is all of the people that have helped me the last several days. Auntie Kaye took me to the hospital and waited for me and held the tub while I threw up. That's love, I tell you. Then my Amy friend let me spend the night at her house that night. Also, many others had to help me because I was not totally prepared for the recovery phase. I really thought that this was not going to be so big of a deal. I've had my knee scoped and I survived that quite well. I was not anticipating lying on the couch on Friday afternoon and literally not able to get up to do anything for myself. It was a really scary feeling. I called up my Kristen friend that lives here in town and she totally hooked me up. She couldn't get away from work that minute, but within 20 minutes of me calling her in near hysteria, her friend, Cheryl came over with food. I hardly even met this lady before, but she was sure an angel of mercy that day. She also came back on Sunday and brought me ice for my polar care pump, homemade chili, soup, and bread. Just because she's nice. That really touched my heart. Kristen came on Saturday and brought me food and visited for a while. A teacher friend/lady in my ward came on Sunday with some homemade brownies and movies. Lori came Sunday night and spent the night. Auntie came back today with enchilada casserole, and my Nan friend called several times to make sure I was alive. Plus, Laurie called a few times and Hillyerie texted me even though she's been helping her own curly headed animal recover from having her tonsils taken out. Then today my very own Kesk came by and brought me those 3 sweet zoo animals I love so much. Nobody can feel sad with that kind of cuteness around. Pretty much, I am so blessed to have so many people care about me.

One more thing...have any of you ever woken up from a drugged induced near coma to this?...