1. Diet Coke
2. It's best not to laugh at the kids who you get in trouble while their parents are still sitting there.
3. Eat garlic before hand...parents tend not to linger.
4. When talking to parents avoid phrases like, "You look so familiar. Did I see you at the bar last weekend?" or "I'm not sure why your kid is failing. Maybe you should just stick him/her in special ed."
5. If a parent tells you that their child is too smart for your class--agree. Then send them directly to the principal to tell her how smart the kid is and demand that they be transferred out of your class and into honors English. Nobody likes those know-it-all kids anyway.
6. Be extra-nice to the parents whose kids are idiots...after all, they are stuck with them forever. You are only pulling a 45 minute shift a few times a week.
7. Never admit that you really have no recollection of ever seeing their child before.
8. On the day of P/T conferences make your kids feel sorry for you because you have to be there all day, and tell them to bring you stuff when they come with their parents.
9. NEVER eat anything homemade they bring you.
10. Make sure you've planned an easy teaching day for the day after because post parent/teacher conference hangover is a beast.
4 comments:
Will any of these tips work in my life, I wonder? If the Bishop calls me to his office to issue a calling and I show up wafting garlic will he change his mind? I would eat anything homemade that anybody brought me. Is that disgraceful? If any parents read your blog and you are extra nice to them they will be soooo sad to know they have a lifetime with an idiot child.
First of all, I have actually said (many times) what the lady was saying in the cartoon. Minus the twit part. But never while I had a noose around my neck. I think I was an English teacher in another life.
Plus also, thank you for the tips. I get so nervous about my kids' parent teacher conferences. Well, mostly I get nervous that someone will throw me in the loony bin for having them...
Cute... I like your 10-list! Hope you have successful PT conf!
hey love the la teacher on thing next time make something new
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